This lovely article in the Huffington Post shines a light on a very important life skill: how to be resilient, how to get back on the playing field when you have been hit hard. More specifically it talks about the qualities that are to be found in resilient people.
In the spirit of the words of Winston Churchill, "It is the courage to continue that counts", what really helps "happy people" be happy and not depressed, according to the research findings, is more often than not how they are able to bounce back to positivity despite the bumps, falls and failures they have encountered. Their qualities?
1. They stay with positive AND negative emotions
We all know how that when we are down everything looks just terrible…resiliency means being able to be down AND also being able to stay grateful- not easy, ay?
2. They are realistically optimistic
As noted in a recent Taiwan National University study resilient people take on an attitude of "realistic optimism," which combines the positive outlook of optimists with the critical thinking of pessimists, something that can boost both happiness and resilience. It is not just about "yes or no" but about "what else?", the ability to create alternative ways to proceed, they don't sink but keep swimming , they have their box and are constantly looking outside it.
3. They reject rejection!
They know that when someone rejects what they say, write or do it is not THEM that is being rejected but the thing or experience itself. They know very well that "rejection" is the course of life and it is not Rejection at all but just "course correction on your journey".
4. They build strong support systems
How funny…did we ever use the word "mastermind" here? Networking, supporting, exchanging----all part of the same game.
5. They notice (and appreciate) the little, positive things
They develop a habit of 3:1- for every negative thing they somehow keep in mind 3 positive things, no matter how small or apparently insignificant---and thus never get diluted!
6. They seek opportunities for growth and learning
I love this one! I have noticed in my life that whenever I am in a setting in which I am learning or growing something of interest to me, I am in straight "happiness mode" no matter what might not be going right…And the flip side to this is that whatever happens to the resilient person is always part of the "leverage factor", he or she is going to take it as a learning experience. "I worked for American Harper's Bazaar... I got fired," Anna Wintour once said. "I recommend that you all get fired, it's a great learning experience."
7. They're endlessly grateful
Sounds weird? Try it! I bet you will find that going into "grateful mode" will nearly always manage to steer the wheel in the other direction, even slightly.
Resiliency should be taught in schools and practiced in life. In my mind, it is by far and away the best "life insurance" one can have.
No comments:
Post a Comment